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If You Touch my Yoohoo, I’ll Kick Your Cookie
Quiver, mantrap, rosebud, jewel, cake, snatch, artichoke, venus mound, sugar basin, clamshell. How many ways are there to describe the female sex organs? Literally hundreds! I have a whole book filled with awesome dirty words and I promise not to repeat the same one twice. But why do we feel it’s necessary to hide behind innuendo and misdirection when all we are really trying to say is vagina, labia, clitoris, and vulva. Shit, I use these words so infrequently that I actually had to look up the correct spelling. Why does our current culture still pretend that woman are Barbie dolls with big boobs, no hips, and a smooth crease…
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Don’t Apologize for Pole Dancing
I don’t apologize for pole dancing. I don’t apologize for drinking green tea or choosing to eat sushi instead of a hamburger. I don’t apologize for enjoying R rated movies or doing the splits at the gym. I definitely don’t apologize for enjoying sex as often as I feel like it either. So if the world thinks I’m going to apologize for dancing around my living room with a shiny metal pole while wearing a bikini top and an itty bitty teeny tiny skirt.... Then the world should think again.