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Where Do You Belong?
I’m having one of those weeks where my I-DONT-BELONG monster is running around pointing out all the places that I don’t fit in. Places where I used to fit in. Places where I never fit in. Places I have no hope of fitting in. Places where I don’t even want to fit in, but wish I felt like the people who do fit in. Places where other people might think I fit in, but I actually don’t. Places where I fit in, but only if I’m huddled up in a ball, waving my arms around like antenna, and paint my face with red and yellow polka dots. Places where I…
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Insecurity isn’t always a B*tch: Me & My Meep!
It happens to all of us eventually. You’re chugging along, working towards your dreams and life offers you an opportunity to do exactly what you were hoping for: Try out a really difficult trick, expand your skills at an advanced workshop, perform for an audience. At first, you’re excited, practically breathless with anticipation, but then you feel something swirling deep in your belly. The feeling intensifies, it’s painful, gurgling, unhappy. Your heartbeat picks up and you feel fearful for no recognizable reason. You want to run away from your pole and hide. You might even start to cry. Suddenly you consider the possibility that you could actually suck at this. …
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Not Giving in to Not Good Enough
I love girls on chairs almost as much as I love girls on poles. There’s something seriously powerful about watching one of your best friends giving your other best friend a lapdance, just because she can. In that moment, nobody is worrying about how big or small her ass should be. Or how her legs compare to [insert championship pole dancer here]. We’re all just enjoying the absolutely carefree playful spirit permeating the room. We shout dirty jokes as the lapdancer pops her booty in the receivers face until one of them has to “tap out” because she is laughing too damn hard. (NOTE – no pole dancers were harmed…
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All’s Fair in Love and Cellulite?
Kiki wrote: I was wondering about a good solution to hiding cellulite during a performance. I’ve seen pole dancers wear fishnets and even do advanced moves with them (inversions, etc.) I would feel better if I had something on my legs. Any advice? Dear Kiki, I totally feel your pain. I remember when I was 12 and had no idea what cellulite was or that I was doomed to one day look at my legs and literally think “eeewww” But before I show you some easy ways to reduce the look of cellulite I wanted to take a minute and rant about how The Rules have hurt us (women with…
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Cross My Heart or Suck My B*lls
I’ve been thinking a lot about The Rules lately. You know, The Rules that “help” you decide what’s right and wrong. The Rules that “explain” how you have to do this, or buy that, to ever have a chance to be beautiful, sexy, healthy, successful, or just plain average. The Rules that say you’ve got to listen to all the “experts,” go to college, and become a mindless drone in some big huge corporation that thinks your name is j88456. God forbid you want to have a good time in your 20’s. And forget fun in your 30’s or 40’s because your fucking 401k isn’t big enough yet. So just…
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Don’t Apologize for Pole Dancing
I don’t apologize for pole dancing. I don’t apologize for drinking green tea or choosing to eat sushi instead of a hamburger. I don’t apologize for enjoying R rated movies or doing the splits at the gym. I definitely don’t apologize for enjoying sex as often as I feel like it either. So if the world thinks I’m going to apologize for dancing around my living room with a shiny metal pole while wearing a bikini top and an itty bitty teeny tiny skirt.... Then the world should think again.
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Get Rid of Shyness & Dance with Confidence
Is your dancing inhibited? Do you get anxious when performing in front of a group, even in your pole class? Are you afraid to dance for you lover? Are you afraid to dance in front the mirror? Make A Wish You’re not alone. Many of my beginner students are afraid to let go of their inhibitions and express their sensual nature through movement. And one of my readers recently asked “I was wondering if you had any advise on getting over the whole embarrassing/shy thing.” Happily, overcoming your performance anxiety is absolutely possible for everyone. And the best part is that, the confidence you gain while dancing will propagate into…
